My Bad Keigo

久しぶり！

It was recently brought to my attention that I have a certain American audience (ahem, Vlad) who would like to follow my blog but are consistently facing a very difficult language barrier.  I.e, they dont speak or read Japanese.  Therefore, I'm going to write more of my blogs in English (after all, I think only like three of my readers speak Japanese anyway).

I was at Mitsuwa Marketplace recently and I asked the man behind the counter if he could wrap my books for me because it was a present for a friend, and I fear that I spoke impolitely in Japanese when I did so.  Now, some of you know that Japanese has varying levels of formality, I'll detail them for you in a hierarchical fashion, the most formal being at the top, and the least formal being at the bottom:

尊敬語,  Son-Kei-go, is super formal and is used when referring to the actions of superiors.

謙譲語, Ken-Jou-go, is also super formal, and used when reffering to the actions of one's self in relation to superiors.

です・ます, Desu / Masu, formal Japanese, is used when speaking to someone higher than you on the social scale, but not necessarily a boss or a teacher. Its commonly used when talking to strangers or asking for help.

である, De-aru is similar in formality to desu/masu form, it is used in formal writing (like newspapers and essays etc)

辞書,Jisho is Dictionary form.  It is informal when spoken, but considered MORE formal when written.  Its just one of those things you have to accept.  Japanese speak like this when talking to friends, most of the time.  I talk to my friend Kazuma and my girlfriend Ai like this.

ヤクザ, Yakuza Japanese.  Its not really called Yakuza Japanese, but its basically gangster Japanese.  Sounds are slurred together and some things are dropped out of words completely.  I use this when I'm telling jokes in Japanese, but it is my impression that this form of speaking is very rude.

Now that I've given you the run-down, lets get back to my story.  When I asked the store clerk if he could wrap the present for my friend, I said it like this 「これは贈り物だから、もしかしてラッピングペーパーがないかな」which is somewhat akin to "this thing is a gift, so dont you have any rapping paper (I'm rude, I'm rude, I'm rude)".  This was promptly brought to my attention by the person accompanying me, who stepped in and corrected my Japanese to be more polite.  It was changed to Keigo: 「すみません、こちら以外の物は細ギフトですから、ラッピングをしていただけないでしょか」which sounds like "excuse me, all but this item is one gift, so can I please recieve the favor of you wrapping it for me? (very polite)".

Needless to say, I felt bad.  I need to practice my Keigo.  I spend so much time talking to friends in Japanese, that I have become too comfortable speaking informally.  When I finally achieve my goals and go to Japan for international study (somewhere, over the rainbow.... haha) I will basically be the rudest person there if I continue to behave like I did at Mitsuwa last week.  In Japan, the level of formality that you speak with is a reflection of how well you know the person.  If you don't know them well, you use formal Japanese, and if you're asking a favor of someone you don't know well, you use Keigo.  If you don't, they'll think you're rude, and they'll be right.  Its a function of Japanese society that Americans must learn to live by when we go to Japan.  I am adamently trying to correct my manners, grammar and behavior so that I wont make my hosts uncomfortable when I arrive.

P.S.: go yourself a favor and go to http://andii.wordpress.com.  He's going to Japan next year.  He's one of my two best buddies, and he posted my favorite Japanese song, "LIFE" by Kimaguren, on his blog.  Watch it and give me some feedback if you feel like it.

Sorejaa, bai bai